You have all read or know of the famous Koranic verse or sura al-Nisa (The Women), which basically speaks of the ‘excellent’ status of women under Islam. It says things like how a women is worth half that of a man and that’s it’s alright to beat a disobedient woman (spare me any comments on – but only lightly!). Well for those of you who cannot stand to hear that sura anymore, we have a new one for you.

A member of the Council of Ex-Muslims of Britain has made up their own more woman-friendly version. Enjoy – at least until the ‘stop giving offence’ brigade start up again. The falcons are already offended and threatening to hack our website. Oh well…



  1. Love it!

    Can we get a recording done by a woman (maybe you)? I feel like this could go viral on YouTube with different women recording it.

  2. I suppose he’s just re-making shit up, I guess that’s how all the new branches of religion start. Where are my manners, welcome!

  3. “…the Quran is miraculous in it’s language”

    If the beauty of words and lines is what counts, I vote we make Tolkien our prophet. “One Ring to rule them all and in the darkness bind them…” I do not normally read poetry but the various verses strewn around LOTR were usually great.

    So I hereby declare the Valar to be just as legitimate deities as Al-Lah.
    And what about the archaic Finn verses about the hero Väinemöinen? They probably have their roots in pre-christian times, so we could all become shamanism believers. Perfectly legitimate, by the “beauty” criteria.

  4. This looks and sounds so similar to the prayers that are broadcast on TV here in the UAE that I might not know the difference. It is missing a live feed of all the men praying at Mecca, but I really don’t want to see that anyway: crowds make me feel claustrophobic.

  5. I love the work Hassan is doing with this. It’s really necessary to counter this stupid myth that the Quran is miraculous in it’s language; something that should be obvious but isn’t, so stuff like this to drive the point home is awesome.

  6. From an artistic point of view, it did sound a little jolty. I suspect that’s due to the singer (or possibly due to whatever electronic effects were added afterwards), not the sura.

  7. It also completely eludes me why the most merciful, most knowing etc. Allah would hide all this rhetoric beauty for the 93% or so of the world which doesn’t understand it at all.

    1. Isn’t it obvious. Allah is a monoglot… That is why he hates the infidels much. We are always talking behind his back and he can never understand what we are saying.

  8. Interesting to hear a pseudo-sura read out in the same style as actual Quranic text! I’m always hearing from Muslims that the passages of the Quran are so holy, it’s impossible to produce anything like it. Impossible to produce “one sura like it” (or is it 10?) They’re always claiming that listening to Quranic reading makes its superhuman beauty obvious. I don’t understand Arabic, so when I deny feeling anything like that it’s easy for them to say it only applies if to Arabic speakers. I wonder if non-Arabic speaking Muslims would be able to distinguish this one from a selection of real suras?

    1. I know. It makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up! And of course we’re not allowed to do it so that is why we are!

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